.You make the GENESIS out of Me.

You know what, today is the end of my examinations! Im filled with lots and lots of relief and joy somehow, cause the past few weeks had not been easy for me really.. And exams is one of the key reason why. Ha. But well, like what Jireh says in his latest post, there's nothing to be happy about anyway.. For the ending of a semester marks the beginning of another semester. Another round of examinations coming soon anyway in half a year.

Still I want to scream out loud and say, Im free for the meantime!!!

You know like yesterday when Im revising for my papers.. I keep thinking about the ministry.. What that have to be done and will be done and should be done! Thoughts about the mission trip keep crossing my mind as well.. Oh my Oh my! Once my exams end, I can focus on giving my best on pastoral and church ministry! haa. That's mainly why Im this excited and happy ya. =)

My to-do list for the next 2 months:
- Sddmm preparation
- discipleship (on specific sheeps)
- Blasting unit: SP shall revive our excitement and identity!
- SP Sports day
- Kbox with Baobao Meinu
- WORK (earn money; tight finance!)
- renew my expired passport
- Ministry recruitment (encourage the guys to be part of ministries!)
- Preparation for mission trip: Hope Kuching
- Training of members for STMs
- WFL registration
- Die die must have Shepherding with Meihwa =)
- a DATE with Joella (important ya.)
- Sisters' date: The West Gang
- preparation for leadership camp
- BIRTHDAYS (especially october)

I shall end it here.. Ha. And following are photos for you to enjoy!

Formal Photo of SP Unit (with some missing!)

Candid shot of the brothers (with Baobao Meinu inside as well)

When praying for our dear birthday girl, Pooiyee

Joyful girls of SP!

Cheeky me with Jolene =)

My beloved hanhan.. haha.

Meiyan and shihui yea.

An informal Ending!!!

Genesis Jorris 12:30:00 PM

A little rainy feeling in me, though the rain that had been pouring for two full days had finally stopped. It seems like the rain have continue to pour down heavily in my heart, that this chill and heavy atmosphere still lingers within me. I do not know how to describe, but the rain of my heart does not represent phases of emotions. This rain seems to be forecasting rainbows and sunshine, it's getting my soul ready to welcome a bright and prosperous morning.

The drips from the rain spread a whole patch of peace across the land of my mind, making me feel undisturb, this feeling is really good. May have got to do with a pause today from my examinations, before the very last paper to come on friday. Seems like it's been a long time since I rest and do nothing, maybe I should do this more regularly. People often thinks, raining is just not good. Cause it's dull and cold, it somehow symbolises sadness. I beg to differ thou. Raining to me symbolises a better weather to arrive, and I patiently awaits.

Have you seen the sun today? Have you raise your forehead up and let the sun from the bright blue sky hits you? It's 26th August 2008 today, and the sky is really beautiful. Like a totally not polluted bright blue sea, that's exactly how the sky looks like right now. And there were clouds that looks like cotton wool, adding excitement to the picture of the sky. I remember I shared with somehow before when she asked me: What makes you relax? I somehow replied: Looking into the sky makes me relaxed.. The wind, the stars, the clouds, the sun, anything that's across the sky they bring smiles to my face. So I just want to share the beautiful sky today to you, so may you probably, share the same feelings as me. =)

Last but not least, I want to say to all my dear friends, dear brothers, dear sisters, I love you ya.

Genesis Jorris 12:27:00 PM

A longing.

What is it?
I miss.

Genesis Jorris 9:43:00 PM

had a great day after all,
the unit prayer meet was really good,
and I truely believe God was together with us.
Want to thank God and affirm 2 person,
Jolene and Jireh for leading us thru the entire session.
Both of you really did a great job!

During the prayer meet as I as worshipping,
the Lord speaks to me with Joel 2:12-13
it says:

Even now," declares the LORD,
"return to me with all your heart,
with fasting and weeping and mourning."
Rend your heart and not your garments.
Return to the LORD your God,
for he is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and abounding in love,
and he relents from sending calamity.

I had a strong urge in my heart that the Lord,
wanted to speak to the many brothers and sisters of SP,
including me myself!
That through the verse it speaks to those who have drifted away,
from the heavenly Lord that cares for us,
to return and be refresh in our heart for Jesus.
The verse reveals to us it is our sinful nature that takes us away from the Lord,
and that God is telling us to come back! Mourn, fast and weep!
Return back into his embrace.

And there was a great assurance of the Lord's love in verse 13,
when it is emphasized regarding his grace, his compassion and his love.
Let us all seek for a renewal of our heart attitude towards the Lord,
so may we not be apart from His spirit, but to grow nearer to Him.
Return to the Lord and fear not He will not accept you,
because He is slow to anger and abounding in love,
and surely He will welcome us back into His arms when we run back to Him.
Let us too not only rend the superficial areas of our lives,
but rather to offer deep from our heart our desires and prayers.
For the verse had reveal, rend our hearts and not our garments.

the Jump concert was very well done too,
I thank God for every single person who work hard to practise,
and rehearsal for this entire concert to be offer up in it's best condition,
to God our heavenly father.
And God is amazing, He answered our prayers and stop the rain!
The entire atmosphere was really high and good,
and one thing I am really glad is I could see plenty praising,
worshipping and lifting up their hands to Jesus!
Thank God for everything.

Just want to pray, that Lord help me continue to witness such great glory,
in every single day of my life so may I continue to be in awe of you. =)

Genesis Jorris 2:04:00 AM

spend all your time waiting

for that second chance

for a break that would make it okay

there's always some reasons

to feel not good enough

and it's hard at the end of the day

I need some distractions

Oh beautiful amazed

memories seek from my brain

let me be empty

oh else weightless and maybe

find some peace within

In the arms of the angels

fly away from here

from this dark cold hotel room

and the endlessness that you fear

you are pulled from the wreckage

from your silent reverie

in the arms of the angels

may you find some comfort here..

Genesis Jorris 9:43:00 PM

I worship You, Almighty God
there is none like You...

I thank God for all those around me in the past 2 weeks,
that have stretch out their hands to support and encourage me.
If not for all of you my dear brothers and sisters,
I would not have come so far and survive these difficult times.
The few weeks had been exhausting and tiring for me,
but God you made them sweet and lovely because you place them around me.

Like to take this time to affirm and thank God for a few people,
thank you all for making a difference in my life. =)

To Pooiyee:
I am very touched by your love for fellow sisters and brothers,
and thank you my dear girl for your sweet encouragement and prayers.
In the past few days where we came together for revision,
your simple willingness just to accompany me to the restroom,
touched my heart because you really shown the heart to be there for others.
It encourages me greatly as well to do likewise for fellow bros and sis.
Thanks greatly for your prayer as well when I nearly can't make it on time,
for my examinations on that tuesday due to the traffic jam..
And indeed God is great, He answered the prayer! I reached right on time.
Just want to say, love you for who you =)
Keep up this encouraging self and loving attitude to let it manifest in SP!

To Terence:
Yo Buddy =)
Thanks for your sweet encouragement and craps all the time.
It do makes my day and help me to relax abit from my stressful exams.
Wanted to say, continue to jiayou with your career and group,
God shall bless all who persevere and believe in Him.
May the Lord bless you for all your future endeavours..
Take care!

To belove leader, Colin Seah aka "ke ling dun":
I think somehow it had not been easy for you as well for the past weeks,
due to your work and also some other issues in your life.
Plenty of things to settle and look into I believe?
But I am indeed impressed by your perseverance that won you success,
as well as your patience in handling every matter in an organized way.
Thank you leader for being there despite you yourself have other burdens,
I appreciate this effort and sacrifice greatly!
Just want to encourage you that your leadership and love for God,
have greatly inspire me regarding the importance of depending on God,
when it comes to serving in His ministry and His church.
Thanks for being my role model, and let's continue to charge for poly/di =)

To all my sheeps, Joella, Jireh, Yiheng, Gordon, Santono:
I really thank God that He blesses me with maturing sheeps,
that despite I do not have sufficient time to meet up with some of you,
you guys had really been understanding and shown great love for me.
I am really touched by many of your encouraging smses and emails,
and am really glad to know so many of you cares for me as well.
To see so many of you growing and maturing in your walk with God,
it really comforts my heart and Im really rejoicing (praise the Lord)!
Just wanted to encourage all of you to seek Him for a greater vision,
so may all of us serve Him in a greater purpose!
As for those brothers serving together with me in SP3,
want to really challenge you all to come together with me to charge,
for our vision for the brothers in SP.. We'll see victory =)

And to my dear Ah hwa:
Thanks for everything you try to do for me,
I really appreciate. =)
with my greatest sincerity I just want to say,
I love you.

To many whom I may not list your name above, but I truely cherish your presence. People like Jolene, Glen, Zul, Steward, Richie, Baorun, etc.. Thanks for being in my life as well.

I love you all. =)
(And most of all, I love you God.)

Genesis Jorris 8:01:00 PM

God is amazing and gracious, Amen?

I am grateful for my heavenly Father for assisting me in the past few weeks of testings and trials where I am heavily burdened with worries in my heart and happenings of my life. I thank God that His plans are in great perfection so that He build a stable foundation in me not to give up my prayers and my faith in Jesus my Lord in times where everything seems to be against me. I am glad that those tough times have not diminish my relationship with God though I admit I do struggle in the process of overcoming my doubts, most importantly, I thank God He answer my prayer to ask of His great power and presence to help me persevere through this stage of my life to proclaim more of His greatness in the future.

After yesterday's service, God somehow speaks to me what He wants to do through all these seemingly traps and punishments in my life. I am ashamed of myself to have questioned God's plan and His awareness of what I am going through that is pushing me to my limits.

After careful listening and spending precious time with my dear Father, I learnt that He have specific plans for everything that had taken place. Indeed my studies are stressing my brain till the juices are leaking, but He speaks that indeed to be His glorifying child and chosen one, this is part and parcel to achieve excellence. To bring glory to Him it comes along with sacrifice, and this is part of the sacrifice I have to make to really do my part towards becoming more like Christ. Studies is very important in the current world, and to be "in the world but not of the world to influence the world", I have to give my best to achieve good results. His rebukes are pleasing to my ears, for indeed I have not done well in my past poly years. I believe that the Lord is speaking that it is never too late to repent and do my best, for He is always around to forgive sincere hearts and assist prayerful minds. Like to encourage those who may have average or poor results, it is never too late to turn back and do your best. And that the Lord will always be around to support you in your studies and your best efforts. It's the effort that counts, not the end result.

I was impressed and inspired in my heart greatly as well regarding of all the disputes and dramatic situations taking place in my family. For those who are not aware, I come from a family that do not believe in Christianity. My parents are buddhists, my siblings are more of free thinkers, and follow what my parents practise in an act of "obedience". I am under great persecution by my two elder sisters due to their jealousy of what they think as "bias" from my parents towards me. My younger brother is following suit as well currently because he had grown up to the rebellious age. The entire family are trapped in quarrels and disputes daily because of disagreements and emotional struggles with each other. I am in great distress to witness my mother being pushed to a stage of depression and low esteem due to the additional factor of changing hormones at her age. The entire family situation is depressing and I am in a stage of not knowing what to do. I could only say it did pushed me to an emotional stage that I nearly break down completely.

But Jesus had a different perspective. His eyes look beyond these circumstances and by His grace He reveal to me at His correct timing His great plans that is to come along with these circumstances overcomed at the end of my perseverance. He speaks to me that along with lasting persistence, my family will see the patience, the love, the wisdom, the conviction that Christ has brought into my heart and my soul. That if I continue to have faith in Jesus and wait upon the Lord for His work to be done, my family will come to a point to accept my decision to receive God into my life and He will work through me to unite my entire family in joy and love and peace. That God will too work through me to touch my mother's heart of His great love for her so may her depression, her low self esteem, her loneliness, her thoughts will be all healed in Jesus's name. That gradually when my brother grows up in the next 1 to 2 years, He will show His timing to me so may I share the great love of Jesus to Him and witness how God is going to make a difference in His life. To help him excel, to help him do his very best and in what he is created to do.

My prayer continues to pray for my entire family salvation, that I want to be filled by Jesus's love so may His love continue to manifest in me to my sisters. My prayer consist of removing the hatred and jealousy among us, to remove any misunderstandings towards Christianity in their hearts, to unite the three sisters together so may we work as a family to glorify God in the days to come. Family may seems to be something insignificant to certain people, especially to younger people because they have yet to taste the fullness of the love from the family. But yet I truely believe and want to encourage all to cherish every single family member and to love them like how Jesus love you and die on the cross for you. If you are the only christian in your family just like me, I encourage you to also have the burden to witness family salvation. I praise God that God had touch the heart of randall's cousin, Kelvin to receive Christ into his life. Let's continue to witness the love of God to manifest in our families.

God is indeed wonderful, God is never wrong, God is indeed always there.

There are plentiful of burdens in my heart, but I learnt that I should never allow these burdens to be overweight in me. But rather, hand them over to Jesus, so that He will always help you not to be underweight, or overweight. Let's all be acceptable weight christians. =)

My heartfelt thoughts for my beloved group, SP3:
Dear brothers, indeed we may not be in a situation that are very favourable. But truely I believe and I want to share that God's hand is upon us and that God wants to bless us if we are willing and if we believe. Surely the Lord had been good and had bless us in the past 1 month with little but fruits that we cherish greatly. Let's work together hand in hand for the revival of the brothers in SP and the replacement of all year 3 brothers! Let's pray hard and work hard for this vision of SP3, for every vision means sacrifices and risks to be take. We may not know with full effort and sacrificing our time, money, focus and other things will bring about what fruits in the end. But with conviction, we give our very best to believe what should be will be what it's going to be in the end. Let's adopt Nehemiah's courage in the bible for he gave up his cushy palace job to go to a foreign place and ask a group of people whom he do not know to rebuild the walls that had been left in poor conditions for a long period of time. Nobody cares about the walls before Nehemiah appears, the chances of people responding were near to impossible. But Nehemiah believe and were courageous because it was

GOD'S VISION.

Let's all be the courageous SP3. We will see revival definitely. =)

Although the brothers group of SP had been stagnant for the past half a year? But I am confident that the Lord's timing had arrive for the brothers to unite and to work and to witness growth, revival, miracle, excitement, conviction, celebration.

Let's all put on God's lenses. =)

Genesis Jorris 6:30:00 PM

I thank God for His grace

that He saved me from the bottomless pit

In testings and trials

I found myself at dead ends all the time

yet Jesus, He is great

He open my eyes and help me learn,

that it is a honor to be tested and go thru trials of life.

Somehow my life often are plotted with tests,

to train me, mould me, shape me, teach me.

The past 3 years had been tough and hard on me,

but yet the past 3 years I've learnt plenty.

So much that I can't measure them in words.

And Jesus speaks to me one great thing

"I'll never arrange testings and trials that I know you can't handle"

and He assure me with His words

"I will always provide for everything you lack along the way"

I am filled with great joy upon His encouragement

for it is indeed a great honor that the Lord of all

place these amount of testings in my life

because He had a great plan to train me for His kingdom

It is a treasure that nothing can be compare

to be His chosen one as an ambassador on earth for Him

Im holding strong even when all goes wrong

I'll not give up even when nobody gives me a hand to grab

He will be there.

Genesis Jorris 2:25:00 AM

seeing is believing.

What did you see?

This is me.

Now.

Genesis Jorris 12:21:00 AM

exams coming and I am damn stress up.
I just can't put my mind at peace to study hard for my papers.
a total of 4 modules to score, this is bad.
I want to like do my best for my studies so that at least I can see,
Improvement?
But fear just seems to be overcoming me.
I am so afraid of like if everything, I just can't seems to be able to see it happening.
Studies become such a big burden for me.
I need to buck up and have a change of my attitude n mind.
I need God to transform my heart so that I can face studies with confidence..

Family is another factor in my life that is troubling me.
I am just so stress up by it as well..
Now my younger brother is being drag into the persecuting circle as well.
The thing that Im so upset about is not because Im persecuted,
but because my mum have to suffer because of me.
The devil is indeed very clever and cunning to use this against me.
I guess the devil knows persecuting me won't works,
so he put everything against my mum to make me feel so depress.
All my siblings are against me, and my decision to believe in Jesus,
had become their excuse to go against everything about me.
God? Help me.. Please help me in this plight Im facing in my family.
Please save my mum from the situation she is undergoing,
I feel great pain to see her painful and crying everyday.
Please relieve her from her pain.. Please.

I am burden for my group as well.. I desire to see growth.
I desire to see all of the guys to be able to be there for each other.
I desire to see unity and support among the brothers, love for one another.
To see SP3 grow strong in quantity and quality is my wish and my vision now,
but yet I am still not sure of how to do this and how to see this come to a pass.
God! I lack almost everything in order to see this being fulfil..
Will you please show grace to us despite we are all sinful people.
Help us to be able to build a strong foundation for SP3,
so that we can see more and more guys joining us as brothers into the family.
Please provide for us everything that we lack along the journey,
so that we will be able to complete the entire project,
and not to give up along the process.

There are like so many things piling on top of me in my life.
And yes indeed they are so heavy and stressful for me.
But somehow I won't give it up so easily,
because in the first place He didn't give me up till death.
Somehow when He was being crucify, when He was being beaten,
He didn't break down but He hold on tight, for my sake.
I believe my decision not to give Him up,
is definitely worth it. He loves me.

God help me really,
never to give you up in my life.
If ever I have the thought in me to just forget about You,
please remind me about everything You have done for me.
So that I will remember that You are the one that make me who I am today.
And that if I were to forget about You,
I will too forget about who I really am.

Help me to continue to love You, and also,
remember that You love me.

Thank You Jesus.

Genesis Jorris 1:08:00 AM

it's exciting to be able to help out image for the upcoming uni ess.

im anticipating.

woooshhh.... the guys group is growing as well,
I thank God for His works in us.
And my prayer is that this growth will be consistent!
God please grow each of us to be your faithful vessel!

I love Jesus. =)

Sometimes I wonder, is it good for me to be a person that will share out my tots?
Or rather share out tots that varies from day to day, different somehow.
Am I sort of the one? I need more of Him somehow.
My surrounding becomes discouragement, and I am unsure of my production.
Am I the vessel, the chosen vessel or am I weakening in fact?
I may appear strong, but I am in fact weak.

Very weak.
God will you come and save me with your strength,
I need your strengthening. I can't survive without Your works.

Random.

I need to train my mind to be build upon His concrete words,
and not upon circumstances and verbal comments.

Genesis Jorris 2:36:00 PM

Like so long since I blog. Wait.
Not really long, it's just considered "long" for Jorris Ng not to blog, for days.

Sort of I felt it's quite long for the past few days?
Because many things happened.
But I thank God for allowing everything that had taken place,
whether good or bad, comforting or hurting, His plans are always the best.
Now looking back, though it's not like if it's for a very long time..
Indeed what that had took place were a great learning for my life.

I sort of slow down the momentum in my life for a rest,
just a simple phase of my life to reflect on my relationship with God.
I want to ask myself clearly this question:

"Do I truely want to serve this Lord whom I proclaim? Am I really His faithful servant? Is my stewardship for His glory given to my best or had it been depending on my mood and my own personal desires? Am I serving with emotions, feelings or with the truth of God?"

I discover alot within me in the past few days..
That there are so many loopholes within my heart, soul, mind and strength.
God help me to understand even clearer that it is impossible,
to serve and be His vessel to build His kingdom with our own human strength.
And He speaks and affirm in my heart to have faith not in what that is seen,
but in what that is unseen, that is His vast strength, power and ability.
All these that is in Him, He generously provide for us, for me,
so long we seek and we find Him, we'll find Him, and it will be given.

Last week service speaks greatly into my heart, and I am grateful,
that the Lord was gracious to me despite I deserve none of His grace.
During the time as the congregation come together to praise and worship Him,
a strong fire burn from within my heart, even in praise my tears flow.
His presence was so strong that I was helpless, only having this desire in me,
to just fall into His arms and ask for His forgiveness for my humanity.
I was in a state of repentance for not doing my best despite of His love,
I am in distress and my heart was filled with sadness.
The Lord was great and loving, He open wide His arms to welcome me,
I was speechless but only to sing and worship His greatness.
My lifted hands represent my surrendered heart and soul, I give Him everything.

In sermon, Pastor Jeff spoke of how to "Follow Jesus".
Each statement strikes my heart, the conclusion cuts into my soul.
I know very well God at that point of time had meant that message for me.

I want to follow Jesus.
I want to be His.
I want to put Him first.
No matter what.

You know.. No matter how tough it's gonna be in my life to follow Him,
Im not going to give Him up. Because He changed me totally.
The life that I own today do not belong to myself,
but the life that I live today and in the days to come belong to Him.
I want to live this life that He bless me to the fullest,
because He loves me.

It's not about my perseverance and persistence that makes the difference,
it's not about me being strong and going through all the tough times.
It's about Him you know? It's about what He had done for me.

I love Jesus. Thank you Jesus. Love you Jesus.

Genesis Jorris 6:31:00 PM

I am

I know

I Speak